>There are situations in which one may be placed in that can brew the feeling of uncomfortable. This can range from situations such as walking into a bathroom, performing your business (whichever number that may be) and realizing that there is no toilet paper to meet in front of you, on the side of you or anywhere in your tiny cubicle of a stall. This can also be the situation in regards to God and His hand-in-hand leading (Yes, I went from talking about toilet paper to God). See, the hand-in-hand idea seems so great when it comes to my walk with God. I can describe that as my, if I may, spiritual “high point”. I have this eagerness and this pep in my step as God is guiding me.
Then He lets go.
And this is not a let go where He’s out in left field and I am in right field and He’s laughing as I am walking in circles. Instead this “letting go” is precisely what I need. It is another season in which I am learning to see that, as God was hand-in-hand with me, He was also slightly ahead; imprinting His footprints. As I am suddenly “on my own”, I realize that, technically, I am not really on my own. God, and the all-knowing person that He is, set out to mature me in my walk so that when He let me go through some more growing, or letting go, I had these footprints to step into. I had a foundation already laid before me.
The irony of it all is that I do not realize this until I am in this total moment of instant… loss. Last week had been a, and I quote, “Punch in the spirit face.”, John David. It had been this total shift of world where I was turned upside down, dropped and felt completely broken. Just the week before I had been on that hand-in-hand walk. Then I was uncomfortable. I did some crying out, when God had given me this reminder: being broken in Him is okay. He is the best puzzle master. He can put together my pieces better than I or anyone else could ever do. He brings the picture back together. And He has.
In conclusion, toilet paper and God are nothing to be compared. Toilet paper makes its job by being the one thing to unravel, to be finished and to be discarded and flushed. God is in fact the one thing that does not unravel. He is nothing to be finished nor is He to be discarded and flushed. He is the opposite of this. He is the one that has and continues to make the trek before us, constantly and consistently putting His feet before ours to see the lamp He has given us shine out and see the footsteps. As I step into these footsteps, broken and all, I am made comfortable in the tight squeeze I receive. The brokenness begins to peel back with each step and God is waiting ahead, hand out, asking me to grab hold.
